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About Me

  1. ppp86

    Trust issues

    Hi I am looking for some advice possibly from someone who is in or has been in a similar situation to me in the past. I have been with my partner for 3 years and our life is almost perfect apart from one niggling matter that comes up alot when we have a drink.. mostly on my part. a year ago i found out he had been messaging a girl from his past behind my back, telling her she looked amazing etc. i believe thats all it was as he has promised me this. and to most people i guess this is nothing to worry about. but i do. all the time. before i met my oh i was in a relationship for 10 years w
  2. I'm not really sure where to even begin, but I think I'm starting to get a drinking problem. I don't drink every day and I don't crave it, but I do go out for drinks at least once a week. See the thing is, I don't just have a few drinks. I drink so much that I am not in control of my actions and I do really stupid . It's like I just don't know when to stop and the amount of alcohol that I actually consume is ridiculously high and whenever I'm really drunk I always intentionally make bad decisions, especially with boys. I sleep around and I have gotten with people that I'm not even into at all
  3. Oct 23 /2019 I was diagnosed with diabetes. And before that with hypertension. I still have time to turn this around. Right now my A1C is 6.9. And on meds my blood pressure is 105/75. Monday night I am joining a diet support group. I want to lose 50 pounds by next Christmas.
  4. Hello again! Thanks a lot for anyone reading this and making time to answer and help me- I really need it. This post involves various relationships and I did not know where to post it. It will probably be moved. I am 27 old (f) and 1,5 year ago I moved out of my college town to a big city(hometown) for work. I moved in with a very good friend of mine in an 2 bedroom apartment I own (its my fathers actually but I get to use it and not rent), to split the bills and support each other in this new beggining (We do the same job). The original plan was to live with my friend for a year (pl
  5. My adult daughter tries to control my life and has been doing so since my husband (her father) passed away 9 years ago. I did go through a temporary rough patch after he passed but never lost control of my life except I lost a lot of weight and became dehydrated leaving me in the hospital a few times. She freaked out which I understand b/c I am her sole parent now. Once I started dating a few years after that, she became worse and constantly had to know about my dates. I dated someone on and off for about 6 yrs and she resented him so bad that I had to keep them separated most of the time. S
  6. Why is it when break ups occur, we tend to think about all the good things that our partner brought to the relationship rather than what they didn’t bring to the relationship at the end? Have you ever wondered how someone that once claimed to love you ended up walking all over you in the end? Why do we want that which doesn’t want us? There are so many questions we want answered yet we rarely get them. I can remember years ago I couldn’t get my ex out of my head. The thoughts of her with someone else always haunted me but the worst was her being HAPPY with someone else. I forgot all abo
  7. Angel of February is Trust Inspirational Message Move from a place of knowing within you rather than as a result of adaptation to outer experience. Let go of your assumptions and need to control life's creative process. It does not matter what spiritual path you’re on, an ultimate sense of peace comes down to one question: Can you let go of the need to control your life, and trust there is a benevolent force guiding all that ever has, is, and will happen? Trust is the soul's way of attuning to the fundamental laws of reality. There is a deep rhythm that moves through all life that
  8. I'm new to this forum so excuse me if I'm not that clear in what I'm about to say. I have been married for almost two years now. We got married after a very short relationship which was wonderful and very loving. We saw eachother every day and he was extremely attached to me, which was pretty unusual because of the length of time we had known eachother. Right away in the relationship he expressed his wish to marry me and start a family. To be honest I had a feeling that we were rushing things but he was the first person that I really felt that I was in love with. I got pregnant and
  9. Hello all Im sure this isn't a new unique situation to some people, and I'm sure everyone will be screaming the same answer at me. I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for nearly 4 years now and things have been getting progressively worse under the surface while remaining happy in the outside. I'm in a total rut right now and honestly, the prospect of what I have to do terrifies me. Arguments are a regular accurence now, and honest communication between us is impossible now because I have to be so careful about what I say as she gets very verbally aggresive towards m
  10. So, my boyfriend checks my phone (not religiously, but here and there) I'm not allowed to have a passcode on my phone without him knowing the passcode even though he's allowed to have one. His reason is bc he's always had a password and when I got with him I didn't have a password on my cell so why do I want one now? He gets jealous and makes comments if I wear leggings to work, if I don't anwser my cell at work he will accuse me of cheating or caring more about work than him and sometimes leaves me voicemails calling me names or saying hell kill me and whoever I'm cheating with. I quit my las
  11. My boyfriend and I have been together for more than a year and deeply care for each other. But there’s one thing that was really consistent that comes up from time to time and that is he could be very controlling and opinionated even if sometimes it is hurtful or insensitive. I can give a lot of examples but I suppose we just happen to have a day is a good one. He really loves to golf the entire year even in the cold I was willing to learn it because it something we can do together. We didn’t go over the winter but then again this past spring when the golf course is opened in June
  12. I met my boyfriend 5 years ago i had been through a lot in my previous relationship emotionally with the father of 2 children and he helped me see my worth strength and to find myself again, we were friends for 3 years of that as he was still in a relationship with the mother of his 3 children when we met but he was a great friend and support to me, 2 years ago he decided to leave her and we became a couple, at first things went really well but then he started controlling how I dealt with my kids dad their time with him my input in assisting him for example dropping my kids to their dad he sai
  13. Hi all, I’ve been with my partner for over four years but recently found out that she cheated on me while overseas last year. In short, we’ve agreed to work on our relationship and move on. I found out this week that she’s been talking to one of her ex’s about our relationship problems and it make me very uneasy. She says it’s “not like that” but after everything I just don't know that I’m comfortable with it but I can’t exactly push the issue with her because I don’t want her to feel like I’m controlling her or telling her she can’t speak to people. I feel like it would be different if I
  14. My bf broke up with me after 4 years because he said I was being difficult and challenging but I have no idea what he means. He said he asked me if I was going to have a shower one morning and I said no I will have one when I get home as all my shampoo and gel is there and he used that as the example of when I challenged him. I thought that was really unfair as I didn't even realise that my comment to have the shower at home even bothered him. But now he has said this I have been thinking and I recall times when i have wanted to talk about something like why dont he kiss me much or things to
  15. I have been married for almost 2 years now but I have been with my husband for 8 years in total. I feel like we are still getting in the same fights since we’ve been getting from near the beginning of our relationship. We are very different people. I like doing things and having plans for things, especially big events. I like preparing gifts or food or events for birthdays and holidays. My husband is the opposite. He doesn’t care about holidays, let alone having a plan for one. He likes doing fun things by himself and does not consider asking me to join him or create things to do for us togeth
  16. Hi everyone. This is my first time posting on here for a few years since my last relationship. I broke up with my previous partner of 2 years after a health issue and him not being supportive, there were also other issues including him being unfaithful and gambling - he had debt collecters chasing him and I decided it was the best thing to leave the relationship so I ended it and blocked him on everything and never spoke with him again. I met my new partner soon after who I have been with for a year and a half and he is very supportive, there have been no financial issues between us and I comp
  17. My ex boyfriend doesn’t want us to get back together (he was the one who broke up with me by the way) but at the same time he told me he still loves me and misses me and needs me so much, he also kissed me and he comes to places where he knows I’m at and he finds excuses to meet me and tries to kiss me all the time and he gets jealous if any guy talks or flirts with me, he says he wants to “protect me” and he asked me If I’m talking to a new guy or dating someone new, I explained to him that I don’t agree that he kisses me since we’re not together anymore but later he kissed me against my will
  18. This has been bugging me, so I thought I'd get some opinions. This weekend, a shy guy, whom I previously pursued, but it didn't go anywhere, told me that I'm the girl, so I hold all the cards and am the one in control. He was referring to pursuing and dating in the beginning (at least that's how I took it). Do you agree or disagree with that statement? I don't feel like I am ever the one holding all the cards. Am I wrong?
  19. Here is my own "tool box" and explanation of my own situation. Hopefully there is something in here that can help you. Here is my explanation of my therapy. Ok, here I go. I will start at the top. I have a panic disorder due to the effects of my childhood and other events in my life which just added trauma to my life.So I am in therapy right now to sort that all out. It is going extremely well by my standards and the counselor's standards. So of course a lot of what I has to say pertains to my specific situation but it can be used to fears and anxieties in general. The amygdala is a par
  20. hi everyone, I've met this guy online and we met twice. The first date was really good, there was lot of banter and chats. The second date was really long but it was 90% about his frustrations with his divorce process and custody of his kid. He seem to be pretty upset with the way his ex wife has left him, it appears she left him all of a sudden accusing him of controlling, belittling and neglecting their child. I did ask him several time even before I met him, if he has taken enough break from the breakup or if he is just fresh out of the divorce I do not want to get involved. He said
  21. My fiance and I have been together for 5 years. Although he is a loving, attentive and caring partner, he is also a bit controlling and had a few problems with my independence. In the last couple years our relationship was not going so great. But we still had many good moments that made everything worth it, and we were making efforts to adjust to each other’s needs, which was not so easy: I am the independent type, more career-oriented, while he is more romantic and focused on family and relationship. Also, he has bipolar disorder and refuses to treat it, letting it spill into our relationship
  22. My boyfriend and I , have been together for almost 2 years . Here’s the issue well first of I’m not sure if I’m over reacting and been too controlling . Last Friday he told me to go over to his house and we were supposed to hang out . He had just got done working on his friends truck and we were supposed to drop off his friend somewhere . Well long story short , more of his friends started coming to my boyfriend’s place and he started drinking with them . He expected me to wait all night for him in his room while he was outside the house drinking and smoking with them . He works out of town a
  23. met this guy at uni. The first few days were a little bit weird because he would text me all day non-stop. I got used to it and I started liking him. As soon as it happened he started taking more time to respond to my texts. He’d come back saying “sorry I was eating dinner” or “sorry I didn’t get back to to you I was doing X thing”. He is super sweet in person and he told me he liked me, he even did a Spotify list with my name on it with all the songs I recommended him. I don’t know why I start thinking so much and start getting so paranoid just because he takes more time to get back to me via
  24. Hi im 24 year old lesbian and my girlfriend is 24 and I get jealous everytime she messaging on her phone and i accidentally logged into her snapchat account and blocked people from talking to her
  25. Wanted to make her aware that she has the power, and remove some from her dad who she lives with. Told her she's at the age she can decide she wants to live with me. I don't really think she would which I mentioned as well. But she would have to go to court to make the change. Anyway, instead of feeling weak like I was feeling it gives me a sense of control too. I told her it would be a huge change, but she has said she wondered what she'd be like if she grew up with me instead. So I basically let her know she could change if she wanted. I'm frustrated with his neglectful attitude. She
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